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Dealing with Divorce – Avoid Divorce and Fix Your Marital Problems Instantly

Dealing with divorce is one of the most difficult phases in one”s life that needs couple of times to think about It”s a very serious matter that”s why considering all the circumstances first before getting into it completely

Dealing with divorce is one of the most difficult phases in one”s life that needs couple of times to think about. It”s a very serious matter that”s why considering all the circumstances first before getting into it completely. Many couples of today end up with divorce for many reasons. However the reasons should be something that you are sure nothing in your marriage life will change and the only solution is to get a divorce. You must not give up easily on a relationship as dealing with divorce is no joke; it will make a deeper impact in your life in the future. It”s unless if your spouse is one that worth giving up for like if he”s an abusive husband or parent.

To some, avoiding the situation of getting and dealing with divorce is easy. It”s because they know how to handle well their relationship. All it takes is giving your best character and traits that you have and you should have. Take control of your marriage life as it”s the life you have.

When encountering marital problems, tell your spouse to have a talk with you, something serious but make it calm and smooth. Know if he is willing to take chance to work out your marriage relationship. Let him know what you have been thinking then know what he has in mind too. Is he aware that dealing with divorce can become a great problem more than he think or does he really want it to happen? Do not be harsh if he said something that you don”t like. Control your feelings and keep it within you to avoid adding up trouble to the bad situation. After all you don”t want to come up dealing with divorce, right? If you feel that the temperature rises in the room, then just tell him to make a list of the things that bothers him also, and make your own too. And after a while that you both have cool down, grab a seat and exchange your lists. Do not take pride like claiming you”re not like what you”re spouse had write on the list. Instead, change the thing listed and think how you can improve yourself according to what he specifies to make your marriage relationship better.

Try spending your weekend to your parents, something that would make both of you separate from each other for a while. If he misses you, you will see him coming to get you. Avoid talking about the problem you have and enjoy the moment. If the time”s right, a good mood will change all bad aspect thus will fix your marital problems instantly. When possible, always lend an ear when he needs it. A wife that”s good listener is much better than a nagging wife. Your husband will be so glad and proud about how you respect him every time he is saying something and you listen to him. And the light bulb of love will sure not to fade out black.

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Will Marriage Counseling Help My Marriage?

If both you and your spouse are willing to give marriage counseling an honest try and if you are both committed to fixing the problems that exist between you, then it is likely that it will help.

There are so many factors that go into keeping a marriage alive that it is impossible to give a simple answer to that question. In a nutshell, if both you and your spouse are willing to give marriage counseling an honest try and if you are both committed to fixing the problems that exist between you, then it is likely that it will help. However, if that is not the case, it is unlikely that anything will help. There are things that you can do to improve the chances of marriage counseling being successful for your relationship.

Be Honest

This means you must be honest with yourself and your spouse. Make sure that you understand what you feel and why you feel it before you go see the counselor. If you do not know what you want, it will be very hard to tell your spouse about it. Then you must be willing to tell your spouse exactly what you are feeling and, if you know, why you are feeling that way. Do not water down the truth to protect their feelings. This will not solve anything.

Be Involved, In And Out Of the Counselor”s Office

When you are at a counseling session, pay attention to what your spouse and the counselor say and answer any questions as completely and honestly as you can. Often times, marriage counselors will assign you projects to do on your own. Make sure you do these even if they seem pointless at the time. They are designed to help you to open up and find a way to get closer to your spouse. Although you may not see the benefits immediately, if you take them seriously, they should pay off in time.

Believe In Success

Adopting a positive attitude about the process can make a huge difference. If you believe that the counseling will work then there is a good chance that it will. If you do not believe in it and are simply going through the motions to keep your spouse off your back then you should expect failure.

Counseling Does Not Guarantee Success

Even if you go into counseling with the best intentions, it may still fail. Some relationships just do not succeed. Some reasons for this include:

– Your spouse is not taking the process seriously and is not willing to do the work necessary.

– Your spouse is not really interested in saving the marriage.

– The problems mostly center on things that you either cannot or are not willing to change.

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The Best Way to Stop Divorce

Stop a divorce as much as possible That”s one rule that most married couples abide by for the sake of their children and the immediate family members who can get affected by the separation

Stop a divorce as much as possible. That”s one rule that most married couples abide by for the sake of their children and the immediate family members who can get affected by the separation. The worst scenario could lead to the problems of broken homes and demoralizing children in the family. So it is only necessary for married couples to avoid getting divorced. If the relationship can still be worked out, why not work it out? Isn”t it best to try and make things work?

To stop fighting is one of the best things to do to stop divorce. Simple disagreements lead to serious disputes without respect and consideration. Consider the important fact that everybody commits mistakes at least once in a while. So to make things better, considering the spouse”s opinions or conditions would only be a good step forward. Respect is also very necessary that without which, proper communication wouldn”t be possible at all.

For women, threatening and nagging the husband isn”t at all respectful. Divorce is neither a good bribe nor a good trade. It isn”t a good motivation as well. Women should learn how to control themselves and should avoid yelling or running away. Sometimes, menstrual period is reasoned for this behavior; however, such occurrence can be avoided by simply having an open mind. Whether in a menstrual cycle or not, one has the power to control by simply having the will power to embrace amity.

If love”s the issue, the best way to stop divorce is to establish a good and honest communication in the relationship. When it comes to love affair, consultation could help ease the doubts or misunderstanding. Confrontation as well makes it easier to determine if the spouse concerned is being honest or not. If something is totally wrong, do not pretend. Honesty with ones feelings is only important otherwise, it would only create a series of lies thereby.

Being calm also helps ease the tension so try to be calm. To stop divorce, one must do away with the nonsense fighting. Fighting with each other is not good especially in front of the children. Always consider the sake of the children.

To stop divorce is the same way as stopping the almost impossible. However, in due time, it could be the best choice. It could lead to a happy family and best of all; the moral fiber of the children still stays with the family. It”s truly difficult to stop divorce but with the truest desire of keeping the family whole and happy everything is possible.

A lot of people would have resorted immediately to divorce without amicable settlement first. The result is that the relationship ends, the family broken and the children”s pain are never mended. The best way to stop divorce is to stop being hasty and thinking that the good relationship isn”t recoverable. Imminently, problems are never truly solved with divorce. It just starts more problems as another course of action is taken. To stop divorce is to stop it all!

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Help Me Save My Marriage and Stop My Divorce

How can I save my marriage when the odds are against me More than 2 out of every 3 serious relationships end in a break up

How can I save my marriage when the odds are against me?

More than 2 out of every 3 serious relationships end in a break up. So many in fact that it makes you wonder whether we were meant to be together at all. Despite the statistics most of us want nothing more than to find a soul mate, settle down and live happily ever after. Don”t worry because there is hope to save your marriage.

You don”t need to be married to suffer the pain of divorce

The breakdown of relationships isn”t limited to married people either. You don”t have to have a wedding to be in a committed and loving relationship but you can suffer the pain of divorce even if you can”t call it that. What is it that makes you push your partner away? What is it about people that makes you incapable of keeping your promises to one another?

Money plays a part in most relationships

Many people who”ve gone through the trauma of divorce say that problems with money were a big factor contributing to their separation. This is a very believable reason because not having enough money or using what little you have on the wrong things can make life pretty miserable. Life is definitely easier with money than it is without it.

While the money theory is a good explanation I personally don”t buy it. I have yet to be convinced that poor people break up more frequently than the rich. You only have to follow the news to see people with loads of money suffering the same kind of relationship problems as the rest of us.

Nature didn”t design us to stay together but you still want to make your marriage work

My personal theory is that you and I are designed by nature to find a mate and remain with them just long enough to raise some kids. It”s basic I know but the facts as I see them fit my theory.

Whatever the reasons for divorce I still believe that most people wish and hope for a long, loving and lasting relationship, I know I do and I firmly believe that it”s possible to beat nature and make your marriage last. So what can you do to avoid ending your marriage?

Marriage is worth the effort so work at it when your marriage needs help

Like everything worth having in this life you need to work at your marriage. You need to work at keeping it alive and kicking every single day. There are no magic bullets and effective techniques don”t come naturally to most of us so you have to learn them. Just like you learned how to ride a bike you have to learn how to keep your marriage together to stop divorce before it starts.

Educate yourself to be an effective married person

There are 2 ways to learn how to be an effective married couple. The first way is by trial and error. Every day you should try something new. It doesn”t matter what it is but make sure that you have the partner that you love in mind when you do it and make sure that you make a mental note of whether or not it helped your relationship. It may sound obvious but it”s important to remember not to repeat any of the things that you find make your relationship worse. When you find things that make you a stronger couple do more of it more often and try more new things that are similar to this one.

The trial and error method can be a powerful weapon in keeping your partner close to you and it can be a lot of fun too. It does take time however so work at it every day and be patient.

Help me save my marriage using methods that work

The second method of learning how to save your marriage is to read books on the subject and learn from the experiences of others. By reading about things that work and those that don”t you will have a much better idea of what you”re doing when working at your marriage. Educating yourself by reading can make your trial and error efforts so much more effective you”ll hardly believe the results.

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Parental Alienation Day – A Sad Reminder of Divorce Gone Wrong for the Children

West Palm Beach, FL (PRWEB) April 25, 2011

April 25th is the sixth annual recognition of Parental Alienation Day. It is a time for all divorced parents to reflect on their relationship with their former spouse and how it may be subtly or overtly affecting the emotional and psychological well-being of their children.

Parental Alienation – when one or both divorcing parents attempts to negatively influence their children about the other parent – is one of the most terrible outcomes of a divorce gone bad. It’s a difficult and complex subject, but the outcome is always the same. Children who are emotionally scarred.

Rosalind Sedacca, founder of the Child-Centered Divorce Network, is a Divorce Coach and author of the internationally acclaimed ebook, How Do I Tell the Kids … about the Divorce? A Create-a-Storybook Guide to Preparing Your Children — with Love! She strongly speaks out about the negative consequences when parents try to implement alienation in any of its forms.

“When you mix two egos with dramatically differing perspectives, you’re bound to get an entanglement of emotions compounded by allegations, defensiveness and self-righteousness,” notes Sedacca. “Unfortunately, no one wins when parental alienation runs its course during and after a divorce. But it’s the children in particular who lose in a big way. Many of them are affected for life.”

Sedacca explains that behind parental alientation are parents who feel totally justified in hating, resenting or otherwise distancing themselves from their former spouse. They fail to take into account how this might psychologically play out in an innocent child who naturally loves both parents. Backed by the strength of their convictions, these parents feel validated in negatively influencing their children’s attitude toward the other parent. Whether its overt put-downs, disparaging comments or more subtle nuances of disdain, they make it clear that they do not like, respect or trust the other parent. The message to the children creates confusion mixed with anxiety, insecurity, guilt and fear.

What’s a child to do when one of their parents says the other parent — who is genetically a part of them — is bad, wrong, hateful, or not worthy of their love? How should a child handle the burden of learning “truths” about their other parent that only an adult can comprehend? Who can a child turn to when Mom is putting down Dad (or vice versa) and it makes them angry, frightened or resentful?

According to Sedacca, parents need to think before they act. They need to look ahead to the consequences before they share secrets that no child should have to know – before they take the innocence of childhood from children who are totally powerless to fix adult problems. They need seek the counsel of professionals who can dispassionately help them make the right decision on their children’s behalf. Then they need to work on healing themselves.

A good source for finding qualified and compassionate divorce professionals is the new DivorceCures.com Directory. Professionals, including collaborative law and other divorce attorneys, mediators, therapists, divorce coaches and divorce financial planners, listed at DivorceCures.com have taken the Kids Come First Coalition pledge to put the child’s best interests first in any divorce interaction. Sedacca recommends that parents seek out these child-centered professionals who will steer them away from behaviors and decisions that create parental alienation or other negative psychological effects on the innocent children of divorce.

Sedacca’s advice: “Parental alienation is a sure way to risk alienating your children from you – if not today, in the years and decades ahead. When making decisions about your divorce, child custody issues, visitations, holiday celebrations and all the day-to-day activities that fill our busy lives, remember to be a parent first. Put aside your personal feelings about your former spouse. Stop – and see that other parent from your child’s perspective – as the Mom or Dad they deeply love.”

To access the new Divorce Cures Directory parents are invited to visit: http://www.divorcecures.com. To receive Sedacca’s free ebook, Post-Divorce Parenting: Success Strategies for Getting It Right, as well as her free weekly ezine, How Do I Tell the Kids about the Divorce? and other valuable resources for parents, go to: http://www.childcentereddivorce.com.

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Rosalind Sedacca

Child-Centered Divorce

561 742-3537