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Common Causes of Divorce – Keys to Save Your Marriage – Part 1

If you are married or about to be married – Listen up! This information can save you years of agony; years that can be years filled with joy and happiness, IF you remedy the common causes of divorce.

It does not matter if you are engaged, just married or been married for years. In all likelihood your marriage is in trouble or it could be improved upon, or you wouldn’t be reading this.

Divorce is like quicksand. It is slippery and once in it, it increases its grip making it very difficult to escape. Like quicksand, divorce is a trap, unseen until you are caught in it.

Marriages come with an automatic built-in feature known as common causes of divorce. You may not even know they exist. Most likely, no one has ever given you a book on the subjects of marriage and/or relationships. But you do have TV, family and friends, and ALL of them have given you the wrong instructions and examples of what a good marriage is and why.

The television has filled your head full of beautiful pictures of beautiful women, handsome men, all starry-eyed with romantic delusions.

Aren’t marriages suppose to be fairy tale, “…live happily ever after”?

The reality is, after the romantic glitz and glitter of the Honeymoon, life gets real.

Now it is time for jobs to pay the bills and vacuuming the floors and fixing the meals and doing the laundry. And sooner or later – kids! Kids with snotty noses, dirty bottoms and constant crying for attention. What happened to the honeymoon?

This is where life gets real. This where you get sloppy and stop putting your best foot forward, taking each other for granted. This is where all the expectations you have for each other get declared. This is where all the virtues you sold or were sold are being delivered less than 50% of the time.

Do you feel cheated yet?

How can you tell?

Take this little test for some common causes of divorce:

If you are a man, can you list the expectations your wife has for you?

Which are usually as follows:

(1) Patience and understanding for every circumstance

(2) Ability to listen with interest to everything she has to say as if it matters to you

(3) Compliment and encourage her about everything she has done, or ever will do or is doing

(4) Give her complete and total emotional support for whatever it is she values in life

If you are a woman, can you list the expectations your husband has for you?

Which are usually:

(1) Staying just as sexy and beautiful, exciting and interesting as when you were dating

(2) Give him free time from all domestic responsibilities so he can do what he loves to do

(3) Compliment and encourage him for everything he does, has done or ever will do

(4) Give him complete and total support for whatever he values in life

Are these expectations being fulfilled by either party? Are you smarting because your expectations are not being fulfilled? Are you guilty of not fulfilling their expectations?

Here is the deal. There are no perfect marriages. There are no perfect people. The only thing you can count on in a marriage, or in life for that matter, is change. So get use to it.

In the best of marriages, problems do not leave, people do.

You were headed for divorce even before you got married. Why? Because you do not know the keys to save your marriage. No one ever taught you, because they did not know either.

Pay attention to this key: one the very best thing you can do for your marriage and/or to stop a divorce is to give up your expectations for your partner.

Happiness does not come from getting what you want, but from wanting what you have.

Whether you are headed for divorce or are already divorced, discover more causes of divorce [http://www.magicofmakingupworks.com]. You can download the [http://www.magicofmakingupworks.com] here to help you save your marriage now.

How Are Children Affected by Divorce? 3 Ways

“Divorce” is a word that no child wants to hear. And yet, each year thousands of children around the world hear their parents speaking this word.

In some cases, the parents come right out and tell the kids they are considering a divorce.

But, just as often, the children hear the word spoken in hushed whispers around the house. They may overhear parents’ phone calls to friends, catch a glimpse of an accidentally-left-open e-mail, or hear their parents hurling the word around like a weapon during a fight.

The word divorce strikes fear and dread into the hearts of most children. Unless one of the parents is abusive or otherwise represents an intolerable presence in the household, the idea of divorce will usually be very upsetting to the children of the married couple.

If you are wondering, “How are children affected by divorce?,” here are 3 ways it can affect them:

1. Children will always carry a memory of the divorce with them: Regardless of whether your divorce goes relatively smoothly or whether it becomes a knock-down, drag-out fight, it will become a large feature of your children’s personal histories for the rest of their lives.

2. Children of divorce carry different models in their heads for how marriage works: We all carry around mental models of how life should be. When divorce happens to the family of a child, that model changes. No longer does a child feel that marriage is an unbreakable, secure thing. That can affect the children’s own, future relationships.

3. Intense feelings of anger and resentment can come to the surface: Most children will feel angry or resentful towards their parents or themselves during and after a divorce.

Some marriages seem just destined to break up. And if there is abuse, drug or alcohol addiction, or chronic infidelity in your marriage, it may very well be the case that – sad as it seems – you will all be better off if you get a divorce.

Still, the situation for most married couples is not that bad. For most couples, putting in the effort, resources and energy into saving the marriage now can pay off in the couple staying together.

Get your troubled relationship back on track with expert relationship advice from someone who has saved thousands of marriages at: Bring Our Love and Passion Back [http://www.making-up-is-magic.com/].

Non custodial parents- the aftermath

I am a non-custodial mother. I did not use drugs or drink alcohol everyday. I was a stay at home mom who raised her children while the father worked. The weapon he used against me while we were going through a divorce….because I took anti-depressants..therefore I was an unfit mother.  I was also battered but that didn’t matter….he made $60,000 a year and he did not want to pay child support so he made me out to be a monster…he had a way of twisting words around…We were married 13 years. I did not have the will to fight for my children in court. I let him WIN. I signed the papers.

 

3 years later, I see my children about once every couple months. They are teenagers now and my daughter has already showed signs of depression. Their father has since remarried and so have I. We do not speak to each other.

 

I miss my children everyday….from seeing them off to school, talking about their day to just sitting with them and cuddling. It’s been very hard because for the first 10 years of their life, I was with them 24/7.  I think about them all the time.  I dream about my children every night. I see their smiles before I go to sleep. I love them so very much.

 

Divorce is ugly and I don’t wish it on anyone….

http://www.gather.com/viewArticle.action?articleId=281474979139940

Reasons For High Divorce Rates

There are many reasons husbands and wives get broken up. Break-up is the harsh reality of our culture. It is the uglier side of the coin depicting marriage. Figures show that every 50 out of a hundred marriages in America end in divorces. The good news is that many of these problems can be resolved, with correct knowledge. This piece of writing consists of risk factors for a divorce. Nowadays the number of marriages that finish up in divorce is rapidly increasing. It is really distressing to see that partners often resort to divorce once they notice faults or problems. It looks that they no longer appreciate the meaning of marriage.

A typical idea for young couples seeking to say “I do” is that they must stay together first. They make the assumption that this will allow them to see if they can, indeed, dwell with each other, before they make a lifetime vow. There isn’t any proof at all to confirm this concept! There is, however, scientific studies that show a lot of couples that stay together before marriage have a higher divorce rate.

One of the top reasons for divorce is addiction, whether or not it is alcoholism, substance abuse or gaming. If any of these are found in any relationship then it’s more likely that the relationship will end. If you married your partner knowing that he is already like that and you accepted it, then you should be ready for all the results. Do not think that he/she will change the instant you get married because only one or two will adjust.

Sometimes there are married couples who aren’t yet prepared to commit which makes their marriages to fail in the end. There are several reasons why individuals get married but are still not prepared or ready. This can be as a result of sudden pregnancy; one or both of them simply want to get married while not even thinking of the future. When one person is still immature no matter how understanding the other spouse is, this can still lead to separation. Immaturity is one thing that you cannot simply tell an individual to change or do. When someone remains immature then it will be difficult to make her or him appreciate things. Of course, we are only human we all have our limitations.

Completely different personalities and lifestyle ambitions is high on the list of reasons for divorce. There can be several reasons for this. Though opposites can attract, if a married partner are very different to each other, this can in the end turn out to be tricky. Different ideas of the approach to life they want to live, and how they see marriage can be a serious issue.

For additional information on Divorce Advice For Men, in addition to Reasons For Divorce, visit our blog.

How to Recognize and Deal With A Bully in the Workplace

Step 1

RECOGNIZING A BULLY IN THE WORKPLACE…

* When someone’s behavior intimidates, offends, degrades or humiliates another, possibly in front of other co-workers, clients or customers, this is a sign of bullying.

* When a person repeatedly uses verbal abuse or shows aggressive behavior towards another, this is a sign of bullying.

* When someone threatens another’s work status, undermining his/her standard of work, not giving credit where credit is due, purposely setting up projects to fail and constantly reminding of mistakes, this is a sign of bullying.

* When someone withholds necessary information or purposefully gives the wrong information to another, this is a sign of bullying.

* When someone threatens another’s personal standing (e.g. ageist sexist or ethnic comments).

* When someone is giving impossible deadlines, overworking and creating undue pressures upon another, this is a sign of bullying.

* When someone is isolating another individual from information, opportunities, and outings, this is a sign of bullying.

Step 2

SUGGESTIONS FOR DEALING WITH A BULLY IF YOU ARE THE VICTIM…

* Recognize that you are being bullied, and realize that you are not the source of the problem. When someone is doing his or her best to be negative and demean you, stay positive, reminding yourself that you are a valuable person with much to offer.

* Check out your workplace hand-book or corporate policies to see if bullying is or has been addressed.

* Seek the advice of a supervisor, HR representative or trusted mentor who may have dealt with this type of situation before.

* Ignoring the bully may be helpful.Bullies are looking for a reaction from you and often lose interest if they aren’t given the satisfaction of getting one.

* Act more confident. If a person who bullies feels that they don’t have any power over you, it takes the ‘fun’ out of it for them.

* With confidence, confront the bully in a professional manner.Stay as calm as possible, firmly telling them to leave you alone.You may want to ask a supervisor to be with you when confronting the bully.

* Hang around with other people, and don’t let the bully alienate you from others.

* Keep a journal detailing the nature of the bullying (e.g., dates, times, places, what was said or done and who else was present as a witness).

* Obtain and keep copies of harassing/bullying paper trails; emails, faxes, phone messages and hold onto copies of documents that contradict the bully’s accusations against you (e.g., time sheets, audit reports, etc.).

* If the bullying continues, present your case to the person in charge or to the HR department.There are also many websites that will give you more information as to what you can do and what your rights are, along with Employment Law Attorney site options.

Department Of Labor & Industries

Workplace Bullying Institute

Don’t let a workplace bully intimidate you, jeopardize your job and tarnish your feelings of self-worth. Take the bull by the horns with confidence, know that it is not your fault, but that it is all about them and their problems. DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT TO GET IT STOPPED.

http://www.infobarrel.com/How_to_Recognize_and_Deal_With_A_Bully_in_the_Workplace

A Marriage Saving Wager

There you are, trying to decide whether your marriage can be saved, or if you even want to save it! Many times, we find ourselves struggling and struggling, ready to just give up. We tell ourselves that it just isn’t worth it, but then find ourselves looking for information.

That usually means you aren’t quite ready to “throw in your towel.” So, why not take what I am calling “Baucom’s Wager?”

What is Baucom’s wager? Glad you asked. But first, you get a short history/philosophy lesson. I promise it won’t be painful.

Back in the 1600’s, philosopher Blaise Pascal was struggling with the many topics that could not, at that time, be proven. He was pushing for people to use reason. Into that fray he stepped, trying to address belief in God. The obvious then is still the obvious: God remains unprovable (and undisprovable) by science. So, Pascal saw it as a matter of faith.

He proposed a wager that is now know as Pascal’s Wager. The wager is this “People should believe in God, as it makes reasonable sense. If you believe in God, and there is no God, you have lost nothing. If you believe in God, and there is God, you have gained everything. If you don’t believe in God, and there is God, you lose everything.” In essence, the only losing position was not believing in God, and finding that there is God. For Pascal, it was clear that it only made sense to believe in God.

Now, here is Baucom’s Wager. I apply it to whether or not you should work to save your marriage. Don’t worry, it is not about God, merely that I am borrowing Pascal’s frame. So, here is my Wager:

* If you work on your marriage, and it cannot be saved, you have lost nothing.

* If you work on your marriage and save it, you have gained your relationship.

* If you do not work on your marriage, you have lost the relationship.

In essence, it is reasonable to work on the relationship. You have nothing to lose and everything to gain! In fact, if you look at the wager, it is obvious that you should work on your marriage. Until the marriage is over, or until you are truly ready to stop, keep up the resuscitation!

During my first-aid training, I remember one fact drilled into our heads: once you start resuscitation, don’t stop until the doctor says stop. The reason is simple: no matter how dead the person may look, you don’t know when he or she may resuscitate. In other words, no matter how dead your relationship may look or feel, you don’t know what you might do or say in your efforts that may revive it.

Sometimes, the difference between failure and success in anything is the willingness to keep trying. This is absolutely true for this circumstance! I have seen marriages that everyone thought were dead and buried suddenly become powerful relationships, full of love and future.

Ready to take the wager? Ready to save your marriage? Grab the information you need, including a FREE e-course by going to Save The Marriage. Dr. Baucom has assisted many couples, most on the edge of divorce, to restore their marriage. He can help you resuscitate your marriage, too!

How Divorce Affects Your Children

Recently I spoke with a woman whose coaching practice revolves around the issue of children and divorce. She had many useful strategies for dealing with this challenge but what it all seemed to come down to is this: if you love your children more than you might hate, resent or simply dislike your ex, then you are called upon to act with their well-being first and foremost instead of any hard feelings you may harbor against your former spouse. You must be a bigger person that the issues surrounding your divorce.

This brought to mind a line from a song by the artist Sting from the 80’s when we were still immersed in the cold war. Sting brings the song to an end with the following stanza:

We share the same biology?Regardless of ideology?What might save us, me, and you?Is if the Russians love their children too

We are our children’s role models. How we handle this divorce will have the greatest impact on their future. When your children are grown, how will they look back on how you and your ex chose to handle this situation? Will they be proud of you? Will they thank you for placing their welfare above all else? Will they learn the all important life lessons of compassion, mutual respect, acceptance and letting go of grudges and hurt? You truly need to consider these questions now.

If your ex loves your children then work from that premise. We cannot control our former partner’s every action or their thought processes. Perhaps the support check doesn’t come on time. Perhaps your ex doesn’t show up to pickup the kids on a timely basis. If we can acknowledge the fact that our ex does indeed love the children and treats them accordingly, we will be able to let go of all the little stuff.

If we are divorced with children, we will be in some sort of a relationship with our ex’s forever. To that end, we must do whatever we can to create a relationship that will nurture and support our children. We must learn to let go of grudges that get in the way of co-parenting. A toxic relationship leaks all over the place. Our children are incredibly perceptive. They know what is going on between the two of you even if you do your best to hide it.

What happens if your ex doesn’t see it that way? What if he or she cannot let go of blame and resentment and anger? What do you do if you have done everything you know how to create a mutually respectful relationship and your ex still is extremely difficult and confrontational? In the end you cannot control someone else but you can control yourself. Be the bigger person. Show your children how to do the right thing. Accept the fact that your ex is who they are and figure out the most effective ways to deal with that fact.

Let me give you an example. For years I railed against my ex because he could never be on time to pick up the kids on his one weekday night with them. Our agreement said he should pick them up by 7pm at the latest so I made plans for myself based on that agreement. Never happened and I now understand that it probably never will. Sometimes he is on time but usually not. I tried to control the situation but all it did was make me angry and frustrated. Worse still, my daughter revealed that she felt like a burden because I was always complaining about not being able to adhere to my night out’s schedule.

So I accepted reality and instead always made certain that I had coverage should he be late. I also attempted to have my plans start as late as possible just in case. It was so much easier than fighting a lost cause and it protected my daughter’s feelings and self-esteem. In the end, it was not such a big deal. I gave up being right because the price to pay was far too high.

Here’s another challenge for you when dealing with your ex: thank them when they do what’s right. Apologize if you make say something hurtful or don’t honor an agreement. Everyone wants to feel respected. It goes against how we may be feeling but this has to do with creating an environment that will gift your children with peace.

There are indeed strategies that you can adopt in dealing with your children. Always ensure that your kids know that the divorce has nothing to do with them and isn’t their fault. To do so you must be honest to a certain degree in an age appropriate manner. Confide in them but stay away from any adult themed moral issues. Remind them that Mom and Dad are still Mom and Dad and that will never change. Always ensure that they feel loved and safe and secure. Don’t criticize your ex in front of the kids because then they will feel guilt about loving their parent. Don’t force them to make choices and decisions that will put them in a position of choosing between one or the other parent.

Did I do all this? I am sorry to say I did not. I was very angry and resentful and all too often I let those emotions run the show. I have lived and learned. It is a never- ending process. Just recently I called my ex to see if we could repair a misunderstanding for the sake of our wonderful kids. What I have learned is that our emotions hijack us and we say and do things that we know are wrong, albeit after the explosion. If I could do anything differently, it would be to use the skills I now impart to my clients on controlling emotional reactive behavior.

Start becoming more aware of your body’s cues as to when you are heading into your danger zone of emotional reactivity. Catch yourself before you react and walk away. Take a few minutes to do some deep breathing and get your body and mind back into a rational mode. Perhaps you need to go take a ten-minute walk. Walk away when you become emotional because you are only heading for trouble. When you have returned to a state of equilibrium then and only then decide on the best way to handle the situation.

Parenting is life long process. You may not see the rewards of your sacrifices today or even in the next few years but they will come sooner or later. Usually later. If you think that you have made some mistakes, clean up the mess. Let your kids know that you have learned a great deal and are the wiser for it today. They will come to know in their own time that life does not always go as planned and our experiences hold hidden treasures.

Shelley Stile is an ACC certified Divorce Recovery Life Coach and author. Shelley guides her clients to let go and move on after divorce. Read her new book 95 Tips to Transform Your Life After Divorce at www.divorcesupportbook.com. For more information and the new tele-seminar series, go to www.lifeafteryourdivorce.com.

Divorce Affects the Children, Too

One of the hardest things a child will ever face in their youth is a divorce. Their young minds can’t wrap around the idea that Mommy and Daddy won’t be together forever. Their little hearts hurt when they realize that what they’ve always known to be their family will forever be changed. It’s difficult for children to understand when their parents split up, hard to adapt to the new life of having two homes. Often they will blame themselves and think it is something they have done wrong.

When my ex-husband and I made the decision to end our marriage, we hesitated for a long time before we told our boys. The time came that we were finally ready to sit down and talk with them about the impending divorce, and these inquisitive little boys already knew. Children pick up on a lot more than we give them credit for, and often know things we don’t think they do.

At first, it seemed the boys were adjusting well, and understood that though Mommy and Daddy couldn’t be together anymore, we would still be friends, and we both still loved our boys more than anything else in the World. Events were falling into place and the situation moved along without any hitches.

Then, it must have suddenly hit them, or the shock wore off, because I was surprisingly faced with a tween that hated me and acted out. He blamed me for the divorce, yelled and screamed terrible things at me, and ran off several times in which I had to chase him through neighborhoods.

My younger son didn’t act out or become angry, but he was full of questions. What if’s and why nots. It seemed he was harboring a secret hope in his daydreams of his parents falling in love again and getting back together. Those were some very painful, and sad, answers I had to give him.

I thought about therapy for the oldest to help him cope, but he refused when the subject came up and acted out worse. At my wit’s end, I sat through several phone conversations with their Dad. In the end, all it took was both parents to sit and talk with the boys, at separate times. For both of us to be on the same page, to continue to communicate with one other, and make sure the boys felt wanted and loved by both of us. He made it very clear to our oldest he would be punished at his Dad’s house also for acting out when he was with me. Dad told him under no uncertain terms had things changed in the regard of respecting his Mother and listening to her and behaving for her.

While not all marriages can end us amicably as ours has, and sometimes therapy may be the only choice, if you can still be friends and come together to continue to raise your children as a team, this seems to be a solution that works.

Starr works from her home in Arizona as a freelance writer. Her writing ranges from humor laced snarkfests, gritty and painfully raw non-fiction all the way to her recently discovered dark world of Erotica….  View profile

What Can I Do To Stop My Divorce?

Your wife has just asked for a divorce. More than anything in the world you want to make sure that doesn’t happen. You love your wife and you know that she still loves you. You believe you just need to sit down together and work things out. You know you’ve hurt her in the past and are willing to change. But you don’t know how to even get her to listen to what you have to say. What can you do to stop your divorce? You can’t accept that your marriage is over or that it’s too late for the two of you. What should your next move be?

It isn’t enough to just stop your divorce though. You need to take action to save your marriage too. You have to be willing to do whatever it takes to make that happen. More importantly you need to convince your wife that you’re willing to do that as well. If you can’t make her believe that you’re going to go the extra mile to make your marriage work then there is little you can do to stop your divorce because she’s not going to be feeling it.

Once you make the decision that you want to pull things together and stop your divorce once and for all there are things you can do that will put you on more even footing with your wife. In fact, they may even get your wife to listen to you when she may not have been willing to before. The first thing you need to do is let your wife know how much you appreciate her. Tell her all the things you see now that she does for you to make your life easier and how empty and lonely your life will be without her in it. This alone may not be enough to save your marriage but it can at least get her to think about the possibility of making it work between the two of you.

The next step you need to take is to let your wife know how much you NEED her in your life. This goes beyond your appreciation of the things she does for you and digs deep into the fact that you believe you’re a better man with her than you could ever be on your own. This will get her attention in a big way because more than anything in this world, your wife wants to feel like she’s needed. She needs to be needed by you.

It’s not a major personality overhaul. You don’t have to sacrifice who you are or even really swallow your pride to get your wife’s attention. But if you wait too long to do these things you’ll be trying to get your ex back after the fact instead of trying to stop your divorce.

http://www.streetarticles.com/divorce/what-can-i-do-to-stop-my-divorce

Death, Divorce or Job Loss: 5 Keys to Help You Move past the Pain

We must embrace pain and burn it as fuel for our journey. ~Kenji Miyazawa

It is a common tale. My client was upset by the tension at her job. Management changes had everyone nervous – clients and employees.

“How can this happen?”

“What happens next?”

“Why can’t everything just be like it was?”

Now here’s the interesting part. She is on the far side of a messy divorce. After more than 30 years of marriage, her husband came home one day and told her he was done, didn’t love her anymore, wanted ‘out’.

“How could this happen?”

“What happens to me now?”

“Why can’t everything just be like it was?”

The grief, pain, fear and emotional devastation are similar for a job loss, divorce or death of a loved one. And the process of healing is also similar.

A few years ago, one of the biggest employers in our town went through a take-over, management turnover and downsizing (translate: older workers at higher pay and pension scale). For those who had worked for decades to get their names on the ‘Wall of Service’, the bottom fell out of their lives. Security disappeared with the severance check; anger and uncertainty replaced sense of purpose.

I reminded her how long it took her to recover from the trauma of betrayal and divorce. It’s been more than two years, but she’s putting her life back together. She has been through the steps: rage, denial, grief, uncertainty, loss of esteem to discover calm, peace, and a new sense of direction. She is now a New Woman, freer to express who she truly is and pursue new dreams.

Difficult? Yes, absolutely. No one wants to have their comfortable lifestyle torn away, destroyed by people or circumstances. And emotions can seem overwhelming as your mind searches for answers.

Here are five keys to help you move past the pain to find your rebirth.

1. Remind yourself often that YOU are not defined by your job, your marriage or any other situation. You are capable of loving, giving, blessing and sharing your gifts and talents – regardless of your circumstances. Actively look for ways to be involved with and bless others. Tell yourself – out loud – that you are strong, that you are OK, that you can win. God said you are “more than a conqueror” (Rom. 8:37) and that He has given you the victory (I Cor. 15:57). He also said He will never leave you nor forsake you (Deut. 31:6).

2. Give yourself permission to enjoy life. The sun did not quit shining, flowers still bloom. A cup of hot coffee (or tea!) tastes just as good. Recognize the blessings in your life and BE GRATEFUL. Tell God often how much you appreciate all those little things that make life worth living even in your present circumstances. Tell others, too! Gratitude multiplies – the more you give, the more you will have to be grateful for.

3. Dream. You have actually been given a divine opportunity to re-invent yourself. If time and money were no object, design your perfect life. What does it feel like, sound like, look like? Where are you most happy? Doing what? For whom? Once you have the life ‘designed’ in your head, write it down. Then begin exploring ways to bring it to pass. The universe is designed by God to bring you “the desires of your heart” (Ps. 37:4)

4. Believe. Faith is the most powerful energy in the universe. And it is expressed and confirmed by your words and actions. Use your faith to believe for positive results. Put a watch over your mouth. Negative talk comes to pass just the same as positive confession. Don’t pray one thing (Father, I thank You for a new position) and then tell all your friends that “the economy is so bad, I’ll probably never find a job.” 1 – 1 = 0. No result. Stay on the positive side!

5. Take charge of your feelings. Do not let your emotions control you. You do not have to feel bad, just because you ‘feel bad’. Do something – anything – to short circuit your ‘feelings’. Play music. Dance. Sing. Do something fun. Help someone else. Your emotions actually follow your thoughts, so if you change your thoughts, you will change how you ‘feel’, Feeling sorry for yourself is non-productive.

All the people I knew who lost their jobs in the take-over went through a similar process. Shock, denial, anguish. Slowly, they began to look for options they would never have considered while ‘gainfully employed’. I’ve seen new careers, new home-based businesses, new opportunities emerge from the ashes of loss. People, who were devastated by a situation over which they had no control, have taken control of their lives and moved forward.

There’s a saying that “when God closes a door, He opens a window.” It is true. Deep within, you must recognize that The End is never really an end, just a change of direction.

For more inspiration on building life skills, developing better relationships, and becoming the best YOU possible, visit www.seebecksolutions.com and sign up for your FREE five-part series, “What Matters Most: Five Keys to Living God’s Life of Blessing & Abundance”. You’ll also receive a complimentary subscription to “Solutions for Success”, a weekly ezine of inspiration, motivation and humor to help you along life’s journey.

Ruth Seebeck has built a reputation over more than three decades as a Christian author, speaker, life-skills coach, mentor, and friend. “What should you do when you don’t know what to do?” Ruth helps clients work through the transitions in their lives and find clarity with a Christian perspective. Spiritually based life skills development and personal coaching increase self esteem through greater personal awareness and more effective decision-making.