One thing that you should remember and it’s an important one. You are not the reason for your parents going through a divorce. You need to remember that you are loved and your parents still love and care for you. Some times when people get divorced from each other. They make a better parent. Then later on in life they both may make great friends. When you feel like your parents are putting you in the middle. Let them know how you feel. If you are scared to let them know. Talk to someone you can trust. Even if it’s your teacher after school or a councilor during school hours. You are affected by this as much as your parents. You have feelings and they should be heard. Plus this will make you feel better inside and out. It’s all right to cry and get mad. Just remember when you feel mad and want to hit something. Hit your bed or your pillow. Don’t hurt yourself in any way. That will not bring your parents back to one another. All they will do is blame the other parent for what you have done.
Another thing you can do is this: Take a walk with the parent you are with. Let your parent know how you feel. Let him or her know how it is affect you in school. Some times they will let you know. But if your parent doesn’t want to tell you why because he or she is still upset. Don’t push the subject. Just like you. They also need time to cool down and rethink everything. If you have younger brothers or sisters. Take your time out to talk to them. They will also need support from you. Let them also know that they are not to be blamed for what is going on. Sometimes a group hug works. Because it makes you feel better to know that you are loved not only by your parents but also by your brothers or sisters. They also look up to you. Some times you may never know this until you are out on your own. Your brothers or sisters may look up to you as their hero.
When you find your parents putting you in the middle of things. Example: One parent is in one side of the room and the other parent is in another part on the room. Don’t talk for your parents. Even if you want to. The best thing you can do is go outside and take a walk. But let your parents know you need to take a walk. Because you don’t want to be put in the middle of their problems. If your parents said: ” I need you for support.” Let your parent know that you are there to support him or her. But you will not talk for them. But say it in a nice way. Let them know that they have friends they can call if they need someone to talk for them. Never take sides because later on in life you will worse. Remember that you are only a teen and you don’t have all the answers. No one does when it comes to this. But I can tell you how my teens feel about going through a divorce. And it’s not easy. Your parents are divorcing each other. They are not divorcing you.
Remember that you have a lot of people that care and love you. They know you are going through a hard time in life. They are there if you need a shoulder to cry on and to let everything out. Don’t keep it bottled up. It will tare you apart. If you feel that you have no one to talk to or just can’t get out the words. Write it down. Then hand it to someone you can trust like a teacher and a councilor at school. Let him or her know that the letter you wrote is how you are feeling. If you put down that you want to hurt yourself. Let them know that you don’t want to hurt yourself, so you wrote it down on paper. Maybe he or she can give you more things you can do for yourself. Just remember you are not to blame for what your parents are doing. Also there are a lot of people that care and love you for how you are.