Before I found out my son Lucas had Autism I was watching an episode of Parenthood on NBC. The episode focused on how prevalent divorce rates are and how much they increase when a special needs child is involved. Some quick research on the internet flashes numbers at you like your chance for divorce rate goes from 50% chance to 80-90% chance.
In 2010 there was a study done in the United States at the Center for Autism and Related Disorders (CARD) at the Kennedy Krieger Institute “debunking” these statistics. The study shows a more equal divorce rate among families with special needs children and without.
Regardless, keeping a family together is difficult. So what is the solution?
Finding Time to Keep the Marital Fire Burning
No matter what you call it, Date Night, Respite Care or Getting the Heck Out of Dodge, my advice is that of the Nike Slogan Just Do It!
My husband Jordan and I constantly struggle with asking for help from people for a night out for the two of us. In fact over the past few years most of our dates have been with other people. Mine is typically with my girlfriends going to cooking club or book club while Jordan’s typical night out used to be playing World of War Craft in our living room once a week on his computer with his friends.
While this is a great mental break it does nothing to re-energize the marital batteries. So, recently when my parents offered to have our family over for dinner I decided to take a chance and ask if they would take the boys for dinner while Jordan and I did something else. I hate asking because during the week I need so many “favors.” I request help going to doctors appointments when the kids are sick, deliveries of groceries from Trader Joes or Costco because I just don’t have the time, or someone to watch one child while I take the other to some random appointment of the day.
I am a Mom of twin boys born in 2008, Lucas and Riley. Lucas was recently diagnosed with autism. Prior to being a full time Mom I worked for non-profits as a fundraiser, development officer and director of marketing for a few national organizations on a local level. …divorce rate