Sandra Bell believes one of the best things she has ever done for her son Alexander was NOT to fight to save her marriage.
She admits she became a “basketcase” after her husband found another woman – and that her boy became a victim of their Joseph Rowntree Foundation The Joseph Rowntree Foundation is a social policy research and development charity, seeking to better understand the causes of social difficulties such as poverty and housing and explore ways of overcoming them. claims children from broken homes are twice as likely to suffer from basket case basket case Train wreck Vox populi A derogatory term for a Pt with a dread disease or a terminal illness; a person to be pitied . I couldn’t understand how he could do this to me. I wasn’t a very nice person at that time and that had an effect on my son.
“He became very tearful because he sensed my mood. When my husband finally left, he didn’t see him for 11 months, which wasn’t good.”
They did try to get together again, but no amount of counselling could get
rid of the hurt or the anger.
Sandra says: “I felt very vindictive – I didn’t want a quick divorce. I told him he could wait for five years and I wouldn’t help him. Then one morning I woke up and thought: `Who am I painless pain·less
Free from complication or pain: a painless operation.
painless·ly adv. as possible. You’ve got to put your children first and two parents fighting day in, day out, won’t do anyone any good.
“So get counselling by all means, but if the marriage can’t be made to work, try to make sure the divorce does.”
PLENTY of couples have made their divorce work better than their marriage. Just look at the Mark Phillips This article is about the former husband of Princess Anne, The Princess Royal. For other people named Mark Phillips, see Mark Phillips (disambiguation).
Captain Mark Anthony Peter Phillips also avoided the animosity, but embroiled em·broil
tr.v. em·broiled, em·broil·ing, em·broils
1. To involve in argument, contention, or hostile actions: “Avoid . . . in the War of the David Gray David Gray can refer to:
- David Gray (journalist) – Journalist
- David Gray (mass murderer); see Aramoana massacre
- David Gray (poet) – Poet (1838-1861)
- David Gray (musician) – Musician
- David Gray (British graphic artist) – Graphic artist , 35 was just two when his parents separated. Divorce was less common then and he hated being the only person he knew whose mum and dad didn’t live together.
David said: “I wanted my mother to John Findlay This article is about the U.S. Representative from Pennsylvania. For the U.S. Representative from Maryland, see John Van Lear Findlay.
John Findlay (March 31, 1766 – November 5, 1838) was a member of the U.S. House of Representatives from Pennsylvania. , Director of single parents organisation One Plus, thinks that if children are harmed by divorce, it is by the practical problems of poverty. As many as 75 per cent of divorcees end up on Income Support .
He said: “If there is increased delinquency and lower educational achievement, I think that lack of money is as much to blame.
“If we supported single parents more and stopped talking about them as if they were a disease, it would help their children.”
RELATIONSHIP experts say that there should be more assistance available to help families stay together.
Groups such the Family and Youth Concern, the independent research institute, believes that one of the best ways to make relationships strong is to strengthen the institution of marriage itself.
Indeed, a third of children are born to parents who will never bother with any marriage ceremony at all.
Valerie Riches, Family and Youth Concern’s director says: “It’s not surprising that succeeding governments, both Conservative and Labour, have done nothing to protect the family. Of course, the organisations which work with single families will say that it’s the practicable practicable adj. when something can be done or performed. . Financial incentives and inducements are not sufficient to cement a bad relationship.
However, maybe there is a case to be made to prevent those with children from rushing into another marriage.
The majority will remarry and, Stepfamily step·fam·i·ly
n. pl. step·fam·i·lies
A family with one or more stepchildren. Scotland says: “The step-parent can never replace the birth parent – and they shouldn’t try.
“Divorce is a fact of life. We have to accept that. There’s no point in pretending that we can bring back the nuclear family of mum, dad and two children. We have to deal with how things are, not as we might like them to be.”